I Have Issues!
Mood:  lazy
Now Playing: This Random Guy Singing to his CDs
Topic: Random Thoughts
Okay, I'm waiting for Sangeeta to get out of class so that we can go buy supplies for her new puppy. So anyway I'm sitting in the computer lab checking my email and browsing the web and apparently Luther Vandross is sitting in here with me. I'm not really upset, but it's really entertaining. He is getting down. I wonder if realizes he's singing so loud, cause he has his headphones on.

Onto my life, things have been going pretty good. I've started classes and it's not too hard. New responsibilities at work and they're actually kind of fun. I am working a lot of hours now and it's starting to take a toll on my energy level. All I can think about is sleeping right now, but I can't, because as soon as I finish helping Sangeeta I have to see my boyfriend.

I'm so excited that she's getting a puppy, it's so small and cute. I would show the link but I can't find it. Anyway it's a pek a shih and they only get to be about 7lbs. I want one too, but seeing as I already have a 50lb sharpei and only a 1bedroom apartment, it might not be a good idea to bring another animal home. But I promise that as soon as I get a real home I'm getting another dog. A miniature one!

Okay, gotta go, but I definitely have some updates. Lately I've been thinking about the humor behind some of my traumatic life experiences. I'll share later! One!

I'm Sick and Tired of Being Sick and Tired
Mood:  spacey
Now Playing: Cater 2 U by Destiny's Child
Topic: Journal Entries
Oh my goodness! I have been so sick for the last week. Here in Texas the weather changes every couple of hours. So early this week I get the bright idea to sleep with my window open, because it was in the mid 70s and I thought that turning on my air conditioning would make me sick. Well, I woke up the next morning with 20 degree winds blowing in my face, a sore throat, and a stuffy nose. It has been all down hill since then. I've been sleeping like crazy and I absolute refuse to eat. I can't wait till this is over with. You can imagine that I've been the biggest baby all week. Everytime someone calls they have to listen to me whine about how I'm dying. Cross your fingers maybe I'll be better by Sunday.

Oh yeah, about that last post. Well, let me say that I decided to leave it as is, typos and all, because I just feel like it is a classic. In case You don't know I'm the most obnoxious drunk in the world. I picked a fight with my boyfriend that night after drinking an entire bottle of Champagne by myself (and yes I have absolutely no tolerance for alcohol) and when he wouldn't talk to me I decided to type. There should be a rule: Don't drink and post! Anyway, I don't really remember much from that night, but if You are one of the many people who received either a crazy call or voicemail message from me at 3am. The liquor made me do it!! One!

Boys Suck!!
Mood:  incredulous
Now Playing: My Place by Nelly ft. Jaheim
Topic: Journal Entries
I think that I may have had too much to much too drink. Let me be the one to say that alcohol is very bad. I have been si[p[ong on Chandon for the majority of the night and I am like so f*cked up. I am like so mad at my boyfriend because he decided to call his female friend despite the fact that we discussed it over and over again. See I'm not that damn drun,\/. I know better dammnit. IU have got to find a real guy. Why is it so hard. You know maybe I asked for it!

I'm Baaaack!
Mood:  happy
Now Playing: You Don't Know Me by T.I.
Topic: Journal Entries
Hey! I know it's been awhile, but I've had a really busy past month. Let's see, there were finals and all that other stuff that you have to deal with when classes let out for the semester, there was Christmas shopping, there were friends that had tons of crises, I can't forget work, and then there is the fact that I now have a boyfriend who takes up a lot of my time.
I am so excited about the new year. I have tons to look forward to. I got a promotion and a raise at work, which means that I won't be getting yelled at constantly because I won't be at the front desk anymore. Oh yeah, I'm moving up. I have an office, with a desk and a computer, my own phone line, and a name plate with my name and title on the door. Yeah, see I'm still a student who's never really had a real job, so I feel extra important now. I'm going to also start seeing clients and in fact I have my first session set up for this Thursday. I can't really talk about my clients though, since therapy sessions are all confidential and stuff. But yep, I starting to feel all professional and stuff.
Ok, I have to tell you about my new years, which was probably like the worse ever, but in the end it turned out good. I don't want to bore you with an extra long post tonight, but I catch up on it tomorrow or the next day, promise! One!

Sorry!
Mood:  chatty
Now Playing: Soldja by Destiny's Child
Topic: Journal Entries
Oh my! It's been like a week since I last updated. Sorry, I know I've been falling off, but lately I've kinda felt like I didn't really have anything all that interesting to talk about. Come to think of it I don't really have anything to intersting to talk about today, but oh well...

Thanksgiving is coming up and I think that this will be the first time that I won't spend any part of that day with my family. I don't know if I should rejoice or be sad. In one way, I'm happy because I am forcing myself to start dealing with my homesickness (I'm grown it's time for me to grow up) and on the other hand I'm sad cause I really want to see my family. Anyway I will be spending this day in the D-Town and luckily I have friends here, so I'll still get Thanksgiving dinner.

Okay, just so ya'll know, I am a punk, so I have to end this entry early. Tomorrow is the beginning of a four day weekend so I'll expound on it tomorrow.

Randomess, Reneges, and Other Things
Mood:  celebratory
Now Playing: Crownin Me by Playa Fly
I finished my papers and I've taken my tests. I can rest for two weeks! Yay! Yay! Yay! Sorry if this post doesn't make much sense, I've only had about 15 hours of sleep since Saturday, so I'm just a tad bit delirous and random.

Okay I changed my mind. I have to talk about guys. I know I said I wouldn't anymore, but I need someplace to vent or brag or whatever when things go on. There's nothing really interesting going on right now. I'm getting to know this one guy and oh yeah, he's secret crush guy (from way, way back). He's pretty cool so far. He has a couple of issues, but nothing to bad. Maybe I'll talk more later.

Check out this site href="http://www.sorryeverybody.com">
I love it and my sentiments exactly. Although I do feel kinda guilty. I didn't vote! If only there had been a better choice than Kerry!

Okay, off to bed, hopefully. I'm doped up on caffiene so it may take a little while for me to fall asleep. One!

Gay Marriage?
Mood:  caffeinated
Now Playing: Didn't Cha Know by Erykah Badu
Topic: Mindful Thoughts
Okay, I'll probably be up for awhile because I had a red bull about an hour ago, so I'll waste some time till I can fall asleep. The other day in class we were actually discussing counseling sexual minorities and the subject of gay marriage came up. Now of course, most of the people in the class stayed really quiet because that is a really emotionally charged subject and we have very diverse class. Of course, the classroom idiot was the first to raise her hand and present her opinion. (Yeah, I know I'm wrong for calling her an idiot, but trust me if you were in the class you would think the same thing)

So she decides to give her opinion and imagine my shock when she said the same thing that I have been arguing for the past year or so. That she was not against gays or homosexuality, but she just disagreed with using the term marriage for their partnership. They could use any other name to describe it but a marriage is something that only occurs between a man and woman.

For some reason as she said it, the ignorance of that statement began to dawn on me. I'm totally against marginalizing any portion of the population, but now that I think about supporting the people that are anti-gay marriages has in some way contributed to marginalizing people who consider themselves homosexual. I used to get upset when people compared the plight for civil rights of homosexuals to the plight of black people (and I still don't think that it is entirely the same mainly because black people can't hide the fact that they're black), but now I can't ignore the similarities. Homosexuals are literally the last group where outright hate and abuse against them is still tolerated, simply because of whom they choose to have sex with. Which by the way, usually has no direct effect on the majority of the population. I know it it doesn't affect me when a gay guy has a relationship with another gay guy. I mean for real who cares, you know?

Okay, I'm wandering away from my point. Anyway, as I was saying before I got carried away. I was against gay marriage because I thought that it would make it easier for people to abuse the rights that come with marriage, the whole issue about Christianity vs. Homosexuality, and the fact that marriage should be for men and women to procreate. Then I thought about it. Heterosexuals abuse the sanctity of marriage everyday from the 1 to 2 day marriages (i.e. Nicky Hilton, Brittany Spears, Dennis Rodman, I could go on and on) to the one's who marry just to stay in the country, I mean where does the the term "marriage for convenience" come from. Then I can understand how Christians would be against it, but I don't see why that should effect laws made in the United States. I do know a little about the history of my country (although to be honest I didn't learn as much as I could have in school, because I quickly realized that everything being taught was biased and ignored the large contributions to this country by those from minority populations) and I did learn that this country was founded on the principle of people being free from religious persecution. So again, I have to wonder why is God being used as a tool for people who are against homosexual marriage, because as far as I know religion and government aren't supposed to mix (and then there is that whole other issue about the bible and homosexuality and how I still haven't found a blatant example of a verse that outright says that God says homosexuality is wrong). Then there is that whole thing about men, women, and procreation, and when I think about it, I know plenty of couples who are married and don't have kids.

I know that my reasons against gay marriages may sound dumb to some, well actually they seem pretty dumb to me now, but I had to illustrate the ignorance that is being used by the majority to basically treat an undeserving minority of our population like second class citizens. When I really and truly think about it, there is no reason why two people who are in love and willing to commit to each other for the rest of their lives shouldn't be able to do so, regardless of the sex of the parties, and have it recognized by the government. The idiot in my class was saying that she had no problem with it as long as they didn't use the same name (do you notice the parallel to "Separate but Equal" and to think I actually supported this) and come on if it is something that is as simple as a name, then what difference does it really make?

Life Life
Mood:  blue
Now Playing: Baby I Love You by J-Lo
Topic: Random Thoughts
There really hasn't been much going on in my life lately. I met a guy and we talked for a couple of weeks, but apparently I sabotaged it quite recently. I really believe that I have some issues to deal with, because this makes no sense. I always manage to end budding friendships with guys as soon as I start to feel like we are getting close. Oh well. I'm just going to accept the fact that I don't believe that I will ever be married in this lifetime. I give up! This shall be the last time that I talk about guys on my page (umm...well at least real guys. I'll still mention the love of my life, Donald Trump, every couple of days).

Well, at least for now.

I Thought About You Last Night
Mood:  cool
Now Playing: Green Eyes by Erykah Badu
Topic: My Story With Men
Okay, I don't know what's wrong with me, but for the past couple of nights I've been dreaming about my exes. It's really strange because usually when I dream about an ex, it's always heartbreaker guy. But this go around it has been a different guy each night. However last night, heartbreaker guy, decided to enter my dreams. It didn't affect me the way it used to. Once upon a time, whenever I dreamt of him, I would call him or feel depressed all day. This time I definitely thought about him, but I didn't act on it or actually consider acting on it. Strange huh. It's kinda sad, because I've realized that I've closed a chapter of my life, which, despite how much pained it caused me, I don't think I ever really wanted to close. Ah well, it's time to move on.


"Cross My Mind" by Jill Scott

I was just thinking about you
Wondering if you wear the same cologne
Smelled good
On you
Had the next boyfriend of mine try the same kind
But it stunk on him though.
You know what they say everything ain't for everybody.
But I tried anyway.
You sure did smell good.

You just running across my mind


You had that masculine thing DOWN
Shoulders, back straight never sloping never round
It would turn me on just to see you walk into a room, across the room, out of the room.
You really impressed me.
Eh yeah

You just running cross my mind

I know if I pick up this phone, write this letter send this two way.
I know I'm gonna say some things, I know you gonna say some things
That we both don't mean to say
Like...how amazing...how amazing...
When you would spread my limbs across continents
And bababed way over mountains.
Kiss this and this and this and this and this and this and this and this and this and that.
Show each other where the climax is at.

You just running cross my mind

I was just thinking about you, wondering what you doing I mean what you've been up to
I know its wrong feeling this strong let me take a second minute I will think this thing through

I was just thinking about you, wondering what you doing I mean what you've been up to
I know its wrong feeling this strong let me take a second minute I will think this thing through

Remember all the moments for two, how we used to
Oooh yeah
But the reality honestly...you where never good for me and I was never good for you.
I just remember what we used to do....

I Didn't Know You Cared So Much
Mood:  special
Topic: Journal Entries
Apparently, I have some people who absolutely hate my blog, in fact they hate it so much that they read it whenever I update and post comments whenever I update. Unfortunately, I find the comments to be very negative and it's okay to be negative if you're trying to be constructive, but this person or people ;) is/are just trying to be nasty. As a result, I'm changing my comment setting so that now I will read comments before they are posted on my site. (If you want to see an example check out the comment to Oct. 19. I'm sure he'll enjoy it, because it seems that he desperately wants attention. I've deleted the rest.) *To that one unhappy person* I'm so sorry that my site displeases you so much. Here's a piece of advice. If it bothers you that much and you could less about my posts, then here's an idea: DON'T READ IT! I promise you won't hurt my feelings. But I do know that you must be a really unhappy person, if you want to pick on somebody that you barely know, I'm sorry about whatever is going on in your life that is making you that way. I'll keep you in my prayers.

Now back to my regularly scheduled post. There is someone new. I can't really talk about it right now, because I need to get ready for class, but I'm kinda excited about this person. I'll keep you updated.